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Building Better Relationships
BBB wants to sincerely say THANK YOU! We applaud all teachers that shape the growing minds of this world and make positive impacts on the lives of our youth. As a teacher we know you value education and surround your students with inspiration to learn every day.
How It Works
Teach De-escalation to your class
10 De-escalating techniques to teach your students:
1. Be Empathic and Nonjudgmental
Do not judge or be dismissive of the feelings of the person in distress. Remember that the person’s feelings are real, whether or not you think those feelings are justified. Respect those feelings, keeping in mind that whatever the person is going through could be the most important event in their life at the moment.
2. Respect Personal Space
Be aware of your posture, and proximity when interacting with a person in distress. Allowing personal space shows respect, keeps you safer, and tends to decrease a person’s anxiety. If it seems safe, it may be helpful to move the person away from public spaces and into a private area to talk.
3. Use Nonthreatening Nonverbals
The more a person is in distress, the less they hear your words—and the more they react to your nonverbal communication. Be mindful of your gestures, open your hands and step back. Relax facial expressions, movements, and lower your tone of voice. Keeping your body language neutral will go a long way toward defusing a situation.
4. Keep Your Emotional Brain in Check
Remain calm and rational. While you can’t control the person’s behavior, how you respond to their behavior will have a direct effect on whether the situation escalates or defuses. Positive thoughts like “I can handle this” and “I know what to do” will help you maintain your own rationality and calm the person down.
5. Focus on Feelings
Facts are important, but how a person feels is the heart of the matter. Yet some people have trouble identifying how they feel about what’s happening to them. Watch and listen carefully for the person’s real message. Try saying something like “I understand.” “Help me understand what you need.” “Tell me if I have this right.” Supportive words like these will let the person know that you understand what’s happening.
6. Ignore Challenging Questions
Engaging with people who ask challenging questions is rarely productive. When a person asks you a question, redirect their attention to the issue at hand. Ignore the question and bring their focus back to how you can work together to solve the problem. Example Student: “Why is Mr. Smith so mean? ”
You: “At least we get out early today!”
7. Set Limits
A person who’s upset may not be able to focus on everything you say. Be clear, speak simply, and offer them a positive outcome. Example: “It's important for you to be calm in order for us to be able to talk. Can we do that?”
8. Choose Wisely What You Can Do
It’s important to be thoughtful in offering what you can and what you cannot do. Example : “I understand it’s confusing when rules change, but the school rules say we have to be respectful towards teachers.”
9. BE QUIET-Allow Silence for Reflection
We’ve all experienced awkward silences. By letting silence occur, you are giving the person a chance to reflect on what’s happening and how to proceed. Silence can be a powerful communication tool.
10. Allow Time for Decisions
When a person is upset, they may not be able to think clearly. Give them a few moments to think through what you’ve said. Allowing time brings calm.